In the Air Tonight

Do you ever have times in your life where you feel like you’re on the verge of something that you can’t put your finger on? I do.

Sometimes the way the light looks in the afternoon sky inspires the feeling. Sometimes it’s the stillness in the air. Sometimes it’s the tint that the evening takes on as the sun is setting. Sometimes it’s the traffic and the pace at which it’s moving. Sometimes it’s a random feeling as you’re doing dishes, sitting at your desk, watching TV or grocery shopping. Sometimes it’s a cool draft of air that brushes across my legs while I have my feet up during some serious TV viewing, and there’s no fan or A/C on in the house. It’s something in the neighborhood of unsettling. This morning it felt darker than usual when I awoke, more gray than usual and more still than usual. There wasn’t the same heat in the air at 5:45 as what has been, but it wasn’t officially “cool,” either. It was an odd feeling that stuck with me for most of the morning until the sun came out and the breeze picked up. And then another headache paid me a visit for the latter part of the day.

I’ve felt for a while like I’ve had a key stuck in a lock, and that something is about to make it turn. I can’t tell you whether the turn will reveal something good, bad or something life-changing. Sometimes when I’ve had a few days of good momentum, I think it might be good. Other times when I’ve been in a bit of a rut, I feel like the key will turn and things will be upside down…and then I imagine myself thinking, “Well, what did I expect? I had the signs all along.”

Sometimes I just feel like something’s in the air. And I sort of feel that way now. In a way, I suppose it’s a good thing — if anything, whatever I’m feeling is that little thing that reminds me to not get too comfy, to stay on my toes or to be ready for the unimaginable — in either direction.

Tonight’s odd post leaves me feeling thankful for that little part inside me that generally always has an ear to the ground. It reminds me that we’re not invincible, we’re not untouchable and that we should be thankful for every minute that we have — for change inevitably comes.

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